How to tell if she's interested. Or not.
The trouble with so many women is that they really don't want to hurt your feelings. They're just too damned polite.
Or else they want to be pursued. They need to know that you think they're worth the time and effort. (Don't think they haven't considered this, learned it from their mothers, discussed it with each other.) They suspect you'll value them more, once you've won them over.
Gentlemen, this is not a game. It's self-preservation. At least, that's the way she sees it. So she'll send you signals that she expects any worthy potential mate to be able to pick up on. You are smart and sensitive enough to get it, aren't you?
Relax. Here's a quick guide to interpreting the mating signals used by the human female in the wild to demonstrate that she's interested in a particular male.
She is
• She smiles a LOT. At you.
• You keep "bumping into" her in the halls at work or at school, at a club, in the supermarket. She smiles. Better yet, she laughs.
• She touches her hair when you talk to her or when she knows you're looking at her.
• She touches her nose, ditto.
• She catches your eye repeatedly.
• She laughs frequently at the things you say, even when you know they're not very funny.
• After the stock questions about what you do & what's your sign, she asks real questions about you, your life & interests.
• If you brush her hand or bump her shoulder, she doesn't cringe or move several inches away.
• Caution: Do not be fooled if she touches your arm or shoulder while she's talking to you. This is a personal conversational habit; it only means she doesn't dislike you.
She isn't
• She turns slightly away from you while you're talking to her.
• She crosses her legs (foot pointing away from you), crosses her arms or hugs herself, or does both at once. (Kiss of death.)
• She gets a call on her cell phone and just can't get the caller to hang up.
• She's text messaging even as you speak.
• She fiddles with anything her fingers land on, giving far more attention to her napkin or drink than to anything you have to say.
• She gazes over your shoulder or glances around the room while you're talking.
• She doesn't talk much. No, she probably isn't just the quiet type. Even shy girls can speak when spoken to.
• If you have to wheedle, drag, or bully a phone number out of her, do not think she's "playing hard to get" or that you've broken through her defences. It may not be her number. She won't return your calls.
• If she gives you an open-ended excuse, like "My old boyfriend is stalking me and they haven't caught him yet, but maybe next week" or "I'm not usually allowed out, but maybe I can hide in the dirty laundry again," don't hold your breath.
Once you get the hang of it,
Be careful, though. One fairly common reflex—blushing—is utterly unreliable. Yes, it's completely involuntary, but since it can be caused by both positive and negative feelings, it won't tell you much beyond the obvious fact that you've had an effect. Is she embarrassed? Angry? Flattered? Is she thinking about what she did last night? Well, what did you say to her, anyway?
Of course, one signal is absolutely unmistakable.
If you get this one, you're home free.
Maybe—it could happen—maybe she will ask you out.
The signs are easy to read. Several of them, such as nose or hair touching and arm crossing, are entirely unconscious gestures; you probably send the same signals yourself.