The Older Woman
I just turned 48 years old. Sounds so … seasoned in one respect, and yet I feel just as immature as ever! In fact, when perusing the ads for a playful paramour of my very own, I have to occasionally slap myself with a dose of reality.
"What must I be thinking, by searching for an age range between 35 and 50?" I wonder. It's almost too much to fathom that a 35 year-old is actually 13 years younger than me, so I guess self-denial kicks in causing not-so-premature memory loss.
But, more importantly, what the hell would a 35 year-old want with a woman of 48? This question is further emphasized when I receive emails from men in their early to mid-twenties.
It's punctuated with a pickaxe every time I recall my brief marriage at age 35 to a young man 10 years my junior. He vaguely recognized Bob Dylan, one of my generation's most important musical icons, only as someone with a terrible singing voice. Marital bliss ended with baptism by fire (or three years of Country Western music,) and the realization that the disparity in age does indeed make a difference, especially when you're young.
Now, 13 years later, I'm still getting mail from young men who say, "I'd love to try it with an Older Woman."
It doesn't take Fellini to figure out what "it" is, but the other question still remains: What is this secret ability, this incredibly attractive quality that I've gained – without even trying – just from becoming older? In fact, it's so mysterious; I don't even know what it is.
Maybe it's just stupid not to throw caution to the wind and just go for "it." I just have to ask someone who would know.
"Experience," said one male friend of mine. "They want to have sex with a woman who's been around."
Been around what? I was having sex in my twenties, but with guys just like the ones who are writing to me now that I'm in my forties. There is nothing different that I can see, from the function of sex between then and now. Insert Tab A into Slot B … for the most part, these things are basically universal and cross all age groups.
So, maybe it's not so much experience, but my charming attitude that they're wanting a taste of.
"You know the first thing you should know about making an Older Woman desire you, to really get her juices flowing?" I like to ask them. They're always eager to learn and I am all too happy to teach them.
My fingers tap out the answer but it's my feet that are aching to kick rather than click on the "send" button:
"Don't call her an Older Woman!"